I went to my very first well-doctor/new patient appointment today. I don’t think I’ve been to the doctor without being sick since I was little. I only go if I’m not feeling well, and it takes flu-level sick (or that one time with the back pain while pregnant) to get me there.

In January, when I got sick, I found out I was no longer a patient with my previous doctor, which was absolutely a blessing in disguise. I didn’t like the guy, and his office was very far away. So I went to the little CVS Minute Clinics for the flu and for shingles, and promised myself when I got better I’d get a regular doctor.

So I made the appointment on Tuesday, and I was able to be seen today. It worked really well! My doctor is nice and energetic and probably a little younger than me, and it turns out that I’m relatively healthy. Blood pressure, etc are splendid. It’s just…

Well, I’m fat. I knew that. It’s hard to miss. So I got a little lecture, but it wasn’t as bad as I was expecting.

I told her I’d been walking lately, and she launched into the lecture about, well, if you want to lose weight, it’s all about the carbs/sugar. And I was like, no, I’m not trying to lose weight, I’m trying to move more. I’m not even worrying about my food right now. I don’t care about that. I can focus on this one thing – walking, and then at the end of March, trying to run. I can focus on that, and when that’s a habit, maybe we’ll talk about food.

But she did mention a thing – because don’t think for a second that me telling her that “losing weight” is a phrase that if I focus on it will guarantee failure stopped her lecture – that was kind of interesting. Along with her “carbs are not good”, “yogurt is full of sugar and pasteurized so much to erase any probiotic bonus (except Greek yogurt”, and “fat will stay in your digestive tract for 9 hours but sugar’s in your bloodstream in 60 minutes” spiel, she mentioned something about sugar and protein on the nutrition label.

I don’t know how she got on this particular point, because one moment she’s telling me that breakfast cereal, yogurt, and granola bars are bad, and the next minute she’s telling me that on the nutrition label you should be looking for sugar in the single digits, and protein in the double digits. Come to think of it, she might have been talking about granola/protein bars. That would make sense. But I just glommed onto the Sugar 1, Protein 2 bit.

So anyway. I’m still not going to be worrying about what I eat, if I’m honest, although I will keep what she said in the back of my mind. “Diet” is another one of those words that you might call a “trigger” – I’m not going on another fucking Diet ever, but thinking about nutrition is totally something that seems possible.

Once the moving is a habit. And the water. And I’m still working on both.

Oh, and I get bloodwork tomorrow! I feel so Adult. 😉

February, I’m getting really tired of you trying to copy January’s sh*t.

Actually, February (with one recent exception which I will not mention other to say that it involved Junior Youth and everyone is fine) wasn’t too bad to me. In fact, I finally started doing one of the things I’ve vaguely wanted to do since I got back from the RISE Weekend in January.

Screenshot of Apple's Activity app showing closed circles from Feb 9-24

I have been doing the “move your body for 30 minutes a day” thing! I’m really proud of myself. I haven’t been so physically active since the late 90’s, early 00’s when I tried the Body for Life program. The flu knocked me out of that one, and I just never got back on track.

As much improvement as there’s been in my head in terms of accepting how my body looks (mostly) and being happy at peace with my weight (more or less), I am decidedly unsatisfied with one particular piece about my health.

Two particular pieces.

  1. My knees.
  2. Getting winded when walking up stairs

I mean, my body is pretty strong. It carries me around. My blood pressure is normal. But my knees, man. I can’t crouch, or they’ll give out. I don’t do squats for fear of the same. And I absolutely cannot kneel on the floor (which has made my first two attempts at yoga go particularly poorly) without significant padding because my knees will feel bruised for a week.

And stairs. I get winded. I want to be able to walk up a flight of stairs. That is all.

So, yeah. I’ve been moving. Walking is my favorite move, but I’m trying to do some yoga, too, because I want to be a person who likes yoga nearly as much as I used to want to be a person who liked running.

Speaking of running, I’m also going to be doing the local, in-person, couch-to-5K group in March, and I’ve signed up for the local breast cancer walk/run event in October. This is kind of exciting for me, because, as I just mentioned, I used to really want to be a person who liked running. I even bought a pair of honest-to-goodness running shoes about five years ago, but then I never ran in them. This is clearly a side-effect of the previously mentioned personal development conference that I did in January, as that company is putting on a 10K/half marathon event in December. While I had no intention of doing that particular run at the time of the event when it was revealed (nor do I now), apparently the idea took root.

And oh yeah, I’ve also been practicing getting comfortable in front of a camera! It’s nothing fancy, I just occasionally remember to take my picture when I’m out for a walk. Clearly not every day, but once in a while. I tend to take them at an angle (that’s the best I can manage one-handed), and I’m not always in a good mood (see picture #4), but they’re turning out well. I might keep the practice up, and post them in a group from time to time.

And that is just about all I wanted to say! I hope everyone else is having a fabulous month. See you in a bit!